love change, hate transition

I might be ADHD. I've realized I have a hard time sitting still in one place for too long, most recently in my current life situations. Realities have caved in on me like snow on the roof of the metro-dome! My lease ends at the end of May- I could backpack all summer and transfer jobs elsewhere in August, I could up and move out of the state- there is always a need for Social Workers in random places (Africa?), I could take a sabbatical and learn to crochet these really cute hats I tried on this weekend (which sounds super life giving), I sell everything I own and move to PATAGONIA (ugh, dream of mine), I could start my Masters in the fall (which sounds like a chore, but I really love learning and wanna know so much more about therapy and the brain) OR... I could realize that even though I desire change and movement in my life so frequently, it is really hard for me to transition. It is hard to acknowledge that relationships change and become different after a move, it is hard to find comfort in newness, it's hard to build deep community and instead settle for unintentional relationships (especially when you have had a taste of the most fruitful ones), and it's hard to transition from change.

Do I stay in the comfortable and feel "blah"... or do I jump into the unknown in the next year (or 6 months even) and "understand dependence when I know the Maker's hand"? P.S. does anyone else cry on command when Mumford plays?

I'm signing up for another 1/2 marathon in the Spring. Even though running has never been my favorite (Colorado lacks in good pools for training!), it is a sweet opportunity for me to process and reflect. Not to mention the scenery in Colorado beats any treadmill or trail I was on in KC or Columbia. I have to pay the entrance fees so that I can actually BEGIN the training again, because if I don't have a goal in sight, I tend to whimp out and put it off.

Ultimate realization in all of this- There is risk when you confront and take on change. So far the risk-outcomes have not really been in my favor, so the challenge becomes seeking truth in my identity in Christ and continuing to trust that He makes beauty from ashes.